You got a loicense for that grot?

 So you all know what I'm going to talk about, and I'm pretty sure the puritans at Google are going to put this behind a 18+ filter, so here goes.

The week before, the UK finally put up its pr0n block under the pretence of think of the children and predictably it's broken everything internet related.Reddit, Wikipedia, Spotify and Twitter (still not calling it X) has been affected and a few mainstream porn sites have caved and added it. You can find out more why this is a monumentally stupid law here.

Xhamster for one and I'll tell you a hack around for this later. The only place I've been asked to clarify I'm an old git is Bluesky which needed face verification, but apart from that everywhere else has been trouble free. Oh yeah and that includes the pron. 

Laughing pub bore Nigel Farage has come out on the side of repealing it in a rare W for him and a Labour MP Peter Fyle has called him a Jimmy Savile nonce apologist for opposing it on authoritarian grounds.

Lets face it, its not about blocking porn, it's about neutering the web, and turning it into a western version of the great firewall of China. X rated stuff is an easy wedge for governments and  payment providers to crack down on the behalf of Christshaggers and Radfems. Just look at the ongoing Mastercard clusterfuck on steam and the Tea app controversy which held a lot of private data in an unsecure area was doxxed and leaked to 4chan. 

This is why I won't add my face / payment option to any porn site, it can and will be leaked, for those with long memories the whole Ashley Madison farce comes to mind. Which is exactly why I won't do it.

Oh and some advice for those who are looking at paying for VPN's and stuff, get Brave browser instead, not only do they block ads but their incognito mode uses TOR, which means you can still look at smut from the major sites without putting in info. 

Edit. Apparently even NVIDIA Shaders are not immune to this. 

Double Edit. The BEEX forum I visit daily has now gone invite only thanks to this.  Luckily I know my username and password.

I don't like it

There is a few things more wrong than an antipron  defender. Be it Godshagger or Feminazi they trot out the same old tropes. That watching regular pron leads to the weirder and more degenerate stuff or turns you or your kids into a misogynist. Stuff like Adolescence on Netflix  doesn't help either as it always lays the blame at boys rather than take a general approach.

I don't know why but they always come out with the 2pin stuff  as the absolute end point of it all forgetting that the only people seeking this out will be the curious and the actual bent ref themselves. Most just want them strung up from the nearest lamppost. 

Its always this or violent pron, where they seem to think a  Max Hardcore film is normal for every single porno, if no one is getting slapped or choked out then it can't be real smut. Whereas I, a man of culture, just want a ban of ridiculous skin art. No I don't want to see someone who looks like the tattooed lady from the circus getting shagged, 30 years ago this was fetish only, lets make it that way again. 

 Case in point, I picked up some unlabelled VHS tapes from a boot-sale, a free pick up. Turns out its BDSM stuff, a genre that creeps me the fuck out at the best of times. I have no intention to watch some woman get degraded and FFWD to the end to see if any normal stuff comes on after it's over (Don't laugh I have Caroline Lucas and Nigel Farage's inauguration into the EU from the end of Trans stuff). In fact the the best thing I've gotten from this is a screen grab of a title card (British Pain if anyone wants it) which is exploitable and thanks to Americans online relatable.

Most of the other stuff I've seen don't really do much, they'll either gross you out or leave you cold. Oh and if its gay stuff and your straight it definitely won't do anything at all.  

 

Doing a feminism

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Emperor's Birthday 24

 My birthday today normally comes with a gift, so here is Sony Vegas 13 up on Archive.org from "Sony" themselves. Seeing as I lost the key for my original this is a dogsend. 

Boot sale gods have smiled on me with a good amount of porn / old dance magazines and some vinyl for £20 records are.  John McLean Declaration of Love on Ariwa. Five Star, Depeche Mode People Are People Mute, Some rap comp on LB Bads LaRhon label, and finally Sly and Robbie Land of Rydim. 

Magazines are:

Your Choice Magazine 1st Issue Nov. 82. 

Free! x4 with MC Pugwash on the cover in a Father Christmas outfit.

Touch Magazine x 6 and as a note from here on out not safe for work

Rustler 130 UK Edition x1. June 85 if counting on from this is correct.

Experience Busting Out vol1-1.

Vibrations Vol 9-9

Exposure vol 12-8

Last but not least Claudia 12e Jaargang nr.1 Which is both Red hot and Dutch. 

As well as a box of slides and a stack of cds and videos. Which'll keep me busy for weeks to come. 

Dork Web

 It seems we're getting another moral panic over the internet, specifically the dark web in general. Thanks to this article, here, about the murder of Brianna Ghey. Scarlett Jenkinson used the dark web to look at murder and so called red rooms to look up fucked up content online. Although reading this we have no idea what she actually saw.

Apparently its what all the kids are doing nowadays which I'm sure is nothing but scaremongering and bullshit on behalf of the author drumming up views. He's apparently never heard of Liveleak back in the day or any amount of gore trash which I never bothered with back then. 

The fact is watching some Labour twunt chuntering on about regulating the net on Sky news means that the greatest resource we have ever had is being regulated out of existence, along with the double edged sword of Social media, which I'll admit is mostly good when its good and depressing at its worst.

But back to the article and I note he's got some sort of porn site up, most of what you'll see he's describing is actually on the normie web TCG sites, not sure about zombies but all the rest I've seen over the years.

Also given that every .onion address is a string of numbers and letters means you'll have to bookmark and such so browser history unless you're deleting every time. The fact is I've been a few times for of all things Mr Metokurs blog on Poa.st and the Syro album release website*. Apart from that without knowing any addresses and stuff and despite it baked into Brave as its incognito mode, I have fuck all reason to use it.

* This was actually on brand as it detailed every process your computer used to view the page and varied if you used no adblock or privacy blocker software. The cover of Syro famously lists everything expense and process that went into financing / making the album and if you are any way anal retentive makes fascinating reading.

BBC Prons

There is a credible news story that did the rounds on Monday that was basically a thinly disguised trail for BBC Panorama (and not it not that *BBC sadly.) It boils down to people posting nude pics of their wives / girlfriends on notable spaz aggregator. Reddit. Obviously without consent.  

As an actual porn fan of this sort of shit, I knew it was a bullshit programme long before I knew it was from a subreddit. As a noted tight fist, I wouldn't share anything, but it got me thinking. If this sort of thing is outlawed and trust me it will, what actually, will become of it. I guess some sort of Onlyfans style site where women post nudes themselves would do... but I see a ton of A.I generated content, mainly on Twitter and thinking how Chriddof uses a computer generated woman as an avatar.

What if we were to cut out the middle woman entirely, and just get A.I to generate nudes.

Just train it at Pornhub or some other large dataset of images and such and just get them to create all the porn you need, risk free, with no comebacks. 

It would eliminate consent entirely, if your model isn't real and entirely of age, then there should be no comebacks. I don't know if anyone is doing that now, but lets face it, porn is the innovator, online, so it wouldn't surprise me if they were.

Oh and about that reddit, you know some other subreddit is going to pop up later and all. I know the BBC are slapping their backs and such, but we all know its not going to stop them.

* Gee, I should have just linked to blacked dot com, let's face it, it's what you all thing BBC means outside the UK.

Porn for kids.

 Here is a thing. A lot of galaxy brained weirdos are going on about pron for children. Dedicated soft core stuff. Whether it's an MP's daughter or Radio 4's Women's Hour. They are all pro this sort of stuff.

It doesn't horrify me as much as all the other people commenting on this, basically its been my one mainstay growing up and through adulthood. What they seem to be advocating is the old jazz mags in the hedge type of pron we used to get, growing up in the 80's and 90's in the UK before hardcore was really allowed here.

How much better would it be if we could sit down and basically cover this in sex ed without some God freaks going off on one about thinking of the children. Telling kids that porn is OK but not remotely real life and that, and to generally respect your partner.

Making of a Moral Panic

Been wanting to write about this for a week now. You would have gotten this, earlier, at Easter, but here it is. There seems to be another moral panic coming over pron in schools.

There is a massive sex scandal going round independent schools and such, Dulwich college springs to mind, but it's not the only place its going down. "Rape culture." is of course to blame, as is the easy access to porno. Which reminds me of the old saying correlation is not causation.

Then there are "moderates" like Sarah Vine, wife of Pob, writing about how pron is the worst and bringing up stuff like bikini shots and wider culture is to blame for sexualizing women, and lets get this straight, it's only women. 

Because gay porn does not exist, trans porn does not exist and Lesbian porn certainly does not exist. As does the consensual stuff, shot on a potato cam, badly lit in someone's bedroom, or porn directed by women for women, that I'm pretty sure does not exist. It's only the worst of the worst, rough sex porn clips you know the throat fucker type shit. yer Max Hardcore style degradation, which I personally hate. this is all porn is to those types. And no you do not get any links for those.

Its judging every film ever made, on someone viewing video nasties or torture porn horror movies, and then writing a bunch of words that this is all that movies are.

I don't doubt there is some sort of "rape culture" there. And yes you should educate young men that pron is not what fucking is IRL. There is a whole ball park of things that people will or will not do, respect and don't pressure them into doing stuff.

Oh and then there's this.

"But if there is one thing I could do, it would be this: put internet porn behind a paywall. Make it impossible – or at the very least less possible – for young children to see stuff their brains can’t comprehend. Protect them from this stuff until they are old enough not to let it damage them. Because until that happens we run the risk of blaming our children for the sins of us adults."

I will say this though growing up in the 80's and 90's there was always porno about. Either in the Newsagents on the top shelf, or ripped up in the local hedgerows and parks. Hell, in big school, you can remember when you saw your first pron mag, as sure as when the day a dog got into the school playground.  (can't have been the only one who remembers this from school, actually, every body remembers the dog in the playground.)

Rather than police what your kids do online and take an interest. Its all paywalls and stuff which will not work and kinda exist now for paysites, anyway.

Stella Creasy and the Golden Shower

God knows who this will bring in, for the curious, though, this is two different topics, none of them relate to any extreme sex acts.  TLDR we saw an MP and found some obscure indie in a charity shop that is all.

We went to Walthamstow, again for the first time after their devastating fire that damaged the mall. Indeed six weeks on and one side of shops has been completely damaged including WH Smiths, which has closed for good it seems.

We saw the local MP, Stella Creasy, holding an local surgery, in the place that's normally reserved for the stalls selling chinese toys and paintball experiences. I can only imagine that her regular meeting room was damaged by the fire.  It's quite a come down.

She reminded me a lot of an old boss of mine, also blonde, and she also came across as faintly wet and useless, too. I don't normally see "celebrities" apart from Girls Allowed at Oxford Street HMV, and Bill Oddie, that is the extent of my celeb meeting. My parents have seen Boris Johnson out the front of Wimbledon tube, kinda puts my influence into a cocked hat.

Anyway if you're here for the whole golden shower bit. We picked up a bunch of records from the Sue Ryder shop. Including this, weird record.

It's either T.G.S. the golden shower or that is both the name and the record label. It turns out its the sort of indie rock that sounds a little bit like the Farm or The Happy Mondays. Basically that whole era of guitar dance crossover from the early 90's that is long gone now. 

Spent a good deal of time trying to find out anything about it, all the searches I put in, came back as german porn (i.e. piss fetish stuff, not really my scene to be honest.) Same with Vibe Tribe management, and the ambiguous names created as well as Drive Fever / Freaks demo the names of the tracks.  Putting QPR won't help either as I'll just get results back for Queens Park Rangers football club.

Best I can do is put a draft up in discogs, and a video up on my alt channel on Youtube to see if anyone has any ideas.

Wow, you are big pervert.

We got one of those emails, you know the type, someone playing at hacker claiming to have commandeered your webcam when you visit teh pron site and they want cash or they will have release pics / clips to all your address list contacts / friends / family / your dog.

I knew that it was bollocks straight away, not only because the Mail ran an article about the scam but because we have our cam taped up with black tape since we got it, that and it ended up in our spam folder with a big warning saying  this is a scam dude.  You are not seeing anything unless I stand in front of it and even then why would I take the tape of the cam.

It was sort of scary for a minute as it starts with a partial of an old password of mine (from Myspace and KVR and barely used for anything else), but then scrolling down and reading through it and that it required money to be paid in mickey mouse cash (bitcoin) or it will go to close relatives and people on my address book. So in all its going to fuck all people then.

Sadly though the worlds greatest "hacker" didn't have any badly mangled euphemisms for masturbation, just the line wow you are big pervert along with some broken English.  Which still made me laugh even though its true.

I can see how someone would get suckered in, it did seem genuinely scary until I realised how old the login info it was and that gmail recognised the scam straight away.  We ran a few scans to see if there was malware and virus on my system but it turned up fuck all.  In short if someone says that they have that they're bluffing especially if  your cam is gaffer taped over.

Dead Presidents

So that whole Damian Green thing ended in him being sacked in the end. Just so you know.  Frame up job or not it seems he was a harasser of sorts and that and teh pron got him fired.

In related news the BBC is running wild with a story from the Financial Times that the President Club is the worst thing ever.  I came back from watching France 24 over lunch and was going back to work when this whole harassment thing was the lead story.  No mention of the Taliban's attack on the Save the  Children mission in Afghanistan or anything just blanket wall to wall coverage of a fundraising night gone wrong. 

Billed as the most un PC night ever, several very rich and powerful men decided to be jerks whilst giving to charity, cue groping and some inappropriate hand holding.  Several of the charities gave back all the donations that were given which is a fucking cop out  in my eyes.  Just trouser the cash and be done with it, I know you have moral scruples and such but a donation is a donation.  Beggars (and I've seen your adverts on TV) cannot be choosers.

All the usual bollocks about the *wage gap and patriarchy was wheeled out and Jess Phillips stood up and said words and did very little, as she always does.  In the end it'll blow over and nothing will change, because fundamentally all that complaining does very little to end the genuine sexism that you see in the Arab world for instance where Saudi Arabia very generously let women drive for the first time unaccompanied.  We aren't perfect in the west but I always thought we are on a constant upward spiral of getting there via rights and stuff are concerned.

*1970 Equal Pay act.

Damian PT1

The whole Damian Green story is basically the Mail's hypocrisy in action.

For those that do not read The Daily Mail for fear of contracting cancer or voting Brexit, it comes down to campaigning.  The Mail is very anti porn, they want a total ban on the TGP sites and a not at all credit card style proof of age that isn't going to be hacked and used for naming and shaming. Failing that it back to relying on filters that will not work.

The crux of the story is this, Damian Green used his work PC in parliament to watch porn, a lot of porn, thumbnails and such were found by a total wuss of a cop, during an investigation, a better explanation from the Indy here.  The Mail has of course called it a frame up job, and blames liberals for urging him out.

You would think from such "moral guardians" they would be all out for him to lose his job due to evil porno, but no its full on endorsement.  I don't have a problem with the pron myself, been an avid reader for a good 25 years and the only objectionable thing I've seen is the rise of body art on models (seriously get rid, tattoos are gross).

The Mail in general is pretty good at these double standards with its sidebar of shame and leering at all grown up models and such.  Personally you'll find me on Damian's Side.

Finally before I wrap it up here is a disturbing documentary on Nabokov's Lolita and its parallels with Shirley Temple America's sweetheart.  Not all sweetness and light in fact its full on bent ref material in hindsight.  A warning for you before watching.

Whole playlist here. Seems like Nabokov was a victim rather then a perv all along.

Uptown Junk.

There's been a big update to what I wrote 2 weeks back regarding professional owl model Jenni Murray.  She's the "bird" who thinks its feasible to show porn in class to 15 year old's as part of a wider sex ed discussion.  I'm largely for this, if only to say this is the shit we don't do in life in general.  Although oral and anal does sound awesome to be honest.  Anyway, here is an article on the worlds worst website the Graun explaining it, the comments for once aren't totally vile either.

Also in other news we have a twitter account now, as a way of aggregating all the pages I used to follow separately and now like the loan company says, consolidate them in one feed.  Its @bear_or_bust if you want to follow or just read along and that.


London Junk Trip.

Haven't been up town in a while, so decided to have a look around and do some touristy things.  In the end I just went round the shops instead.  Not losing my shirt at the arcade place on Wardour Street, though I'm still £1.70 down from the Deal or No Deal slots.  Incidentally there's always a deal or no deal slot, go into any pub or club or arcade and there will be a deal or no deal there, complete with Noel Edmonds bastard face peering out.  Mostly though its looking at the record shops such as Phonica and Sounds of the Underground which are awesome.  I got a few of the more recent Fabric live cds including Ryan Elliot and Scuba. 

Didn't really do an awful lot of junk shopping but did check out the Salvation's Barmy charity shop off of Regent's street. Got a few nice things there including  for once some noise,  Satanstornade by Russell Haswell and Masami Akita better known as Veteran Japanoise artist Merzbow.  Sounds a lot like drilling into a derelict space hulk with a low background hum to add texture, not as unlistenable as I feared.  Also got Liberation by Jackie O Motherfucker a nice free improv multi instrumentalist band that sounds pretty 60's in tone, and a few unknowns that turned out to be a punk comp (terrible can't stand much guitar) and a Lemon Jelly single with samples from the same guy from AFX 14 Make a Baby and  an old Cassetteboy track too. 

The worst website in the world.

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A round up of sorts.

Haven't really had the time for one of these in ages, its basically when I'm out of ideas but have had a few things to pick up on for awhile now and they make excellent reading.

Vita stuff.

If you've been living under a rock you'll know that there's a brand new exploit out for the Vita called Henkaku, that allows you to run unsigned code and homebrew programs such as emulation and Doom.  Of course its been out a while and there is of course a firmware update that invalidates this but if you don't update then it should be OK its only some stupid on line functions anyway.  There are also a few things in the works such as rom dumpers and the like which is going to be interesting especially from a preservation perspective or emulation.  Also with a temporary way in it'll be fun to see what anyone comes up with. 

Private Magazine.

Been reading up about the history of Private, the long running Swedish Porno mag / film empire.  They are along with Color Climax some of the oldest porn merchants in Europe and yes I've been reading 70's porn again.

The article in question is actually a good read although there's no nudity possibly not one you'll want to read at work.  Largely it started by Berth Milton taking nude photos of models and then taking them to the justice ministry in the mid 60's and asking if they were permissible or not.  The answer they said is they didn't know, effectively publish and be damned, I won't spoil any more as its a cracking read.

Shit Film X Hess.

Finally found something to edit film for free.  Its a bastard hassle to get including liking on Facebook to get your download and a sign up to register but once you are in and registered its not so bad at all.

Its called Hitfilm 4 Express, and yes it renders out quite nicely with no watermarking or anything other shenanigans free stuff normally adds.  Its adequate for normal stuff and has a compositing strip so you can do ytp stuff and on screen graphics.  Its a bastard to like and register, but the program itself isn't disappointing, true you can't do time stretch stuff like in Vegas or pitch shifting to make YTPMV but you can use an audio editor for that.

Legolas's Cock

They can see my what!!!!!

The world's seemingly going crazy for Legolas cock, or at least Orlando Voorn's Bloom's as he was papped paddle boarding with Katy Perry.  If you haven't seen it yet, its everywhere and everyone is commenting on this, giving a sort of insight into the kind of minds that if it were a women would easily be called a sexist misogynist at worst. 

Decided to dive in and have a butchers at the first link there was and as its that fucking rag the Daily Mirror decided to keep some booze at handy to blot out any socialism that appears. 
As I'm A, a straight white male it did fuck all for me to be honest and clicked to the comments to see what kind of hell I'd fallen into.

Turns out there were pretty few that thought like me.

I'm curious, did this publication directly make the nude pictures of Kate Middleton and
Jennifer Lawrence available as Orlando's are right now?

Because its believed men don't deserve any privacy

Are just some of the quotes that aren't from jealous guys having their own online dick size contest.

(also pro tip if you want to quote from a page that does not let you copy and paste quoted pages from  it first hand just copy and paste it to notepad, and then copy and paste that direct to text)

Its weird that there should be such double standards when it comes to male celebrities where as for women (unlike the hideous break the internet, non paparazzi plastinated Kim Cardassian pics)
 with similar images its all a little seedy.  Either stuff like this and the fappening releases is  acceptable or its not there is no middle ground.

I'm curious, did this publication directly make the nude pictures of Kate Middleton and Jennifer Lawrence available as Orlando's are right now?

I'm curious, did this publication directly make the nude pictures of Kate Middleton and Jennifer Lawrence available as Orlando's are right now?

I'm curious, did this publication directly make the nude pictures of Kate Middleton and Jennifer Lawrence available as Orlando's are right now?

I'm curious, did this publication directly make the nude pictures of Kate Middleton and Jennifer Lawrence available as Orlando's are right now?

Then and now. Anatomy of a Clickbait article.

Been looking at clickbait on Metro again.  I'm supposed to be reading Gamecentral but at the end of the article there are always links off that say one of three things.

Gifs that are distracting as fuck, check.

30% of Britons do not know they have PPI (which I automatically read as please fuck off and die horribly)
His bollocks fell off in the street, what happened next will leave you speechless.
15 Life hacks that are so US specific you really wonder why they're included here.

There is a fourth type though that basically boils down to, star you used to like in a show from way back now looks different now (older and stranger normally or in child star cases, merely grown up).

I normally don't bother with those preferring my clickbait to be about Twitter hissy fits over trivial issues in Television from the professionally aggrieved, and Tumblr Whales.

Pro tip, in an article, if anyone calls black people POCs you know they don't have shit worth saying. There is a difference between being polite and not being racist and just being a PC asshole.

Anyway back to the clickbait.

I've decided to put together a sort of article based on trope number four, but with a NSFW twist.

I call it  These are the girls of Charmed and this is what their tits look like.  So if you want the bloke who went on to star in Nip/Tuck or Brian Krause in the buff ladies and gentlemen you'll have to search elsewhere for that.

First up you may remember Charmed as part of  Channel 5's early evening line up when it first started.  A show about 3 witches living in an old house with boyfriend troubles and a cat if I remember rightly.  Guys only really watched it because they were hot and women because of the drama.  It weren't bad but some episodes where akin to having you cock removed and being beaten to death by feminists with it, thanks to it being skewed toward women viewers.   Also bastard Morrisey on the theme tune heaven knows I'm miserable now.

Also another thing that bugged me was White Lighters Piper's holier than thou boyfriends job.  I guess they couldn't call him an angel because of Middle America. Anyway you came for tits and tits you shall have
NSFW FROM THIS POINT ON.

Shannen Doherty

Holly Marie Combs (My Favourite)

Alyssa Milano.

Rose McGowan

Sorry for turning this into the Daily Sport, normal service will be resumed next week.

Edit typos and Rose McGowan now shows up instead of links.

Ex Machina

First of all I would like to say a few words about Paris and the recent terrorism atrocity there, Sorry man, we had 7/7 way back so kinda know how it feels.  Stuff will get better and that you just need to pick up where you left off and don't let some  V.A.G.I.S.I.L Islamtard cunts stop you from living your lives.

The side bar has a slight updating with some excellent writing from the Males Of Games blog.  Its a critical look at the rise of Feminism in gaming and reminds me of Sargon Of Akkads channel on Youtube (similar content and the like).  If you are a Gamergater or just impartial like myself then please check it out.

Finally we lost Warren Mitchell, A.K.A Alf Garnett.  Til Death Us Do Part and In Sickness and In Health both class sitcoms and to be honest a satire on racism that went over the heads of many who took it to heart much to writer Johnny Speights dismay.  Will probably look up some stuff on Youtube later as they are still funny.

Ex Machina.

Finally got round to seeing this seeing as its Children in  Need or as its know in our house as quick turn over to ITV before Pudsey spots us.  I'll not spoil the film or give away the ending but I will say this its got some of the best music I've heard in a film in ages so much so that I'm going to track down the OST its that good.

The film stars a guy called Caleb who wins a lottery at his place of work (he has a boring office job as a programmer or coder as we must call it now) to become a guinea pig for an A.I project out in the middle of nowhere.  Dropped off by chopper he is given a key card to a hi tech log cabin in the woods and is met by reclusive programming genius Nathan who gives him the tour of the place telling him some rooms are off limits and what he will be doing there.  Essentially there to test his A.I (called Ava) a robot woman created in his lab, he has a one to one meeting with her and gradually begins a relationship with her.  The power cuts that the building is plagued with are caused by her and in the one to one sessions she confides in him when the power is down that Nathan is not what he seems.  Things become fraught when he sides with her instead of Nathan, and his servant a mute Japanese girl called Kyoko and things go from bad to worse...

Caleb.

Initially I thought his character reminded me of erstwhile CBBC anchor Andy Crane who used to do the broom cupboard. Took me to the near end of the film to work out who he reminded me of  Trip from indie game Facade.  He has that same look and manner if you've ever seen it in action, and I suggest you do. Even more spooky is  that Ava does look a bit like Grace in this as well with her short cropped hair. 

Nathan.

Reclusive programmer at the quite obviously not Google, Bluebook search engine (possibly named after the UFO project Bluebook of the same name.) indeed this is what he based Ava's A.I on.  Almost permanently pissed due to the whopping amounts of alcohol he drinks in the film.  A key plot piece takes place when he gets absolutely paralytic and Caleb steals his passkey.  Not the most sympathetic of characters, he does have a few redeeming qualities.

Ava.

A robotic A.I life form who gradually earns the trust of Caleb and that. Possessing a devastating intellect and and composed of parts composed in Nathans lab she is the Android host of his A.I software.  I've said in passing that she reminds me of Grace from facade and that's due to her short hair.  She does get longer hair at the end as like I said she is an Android, so its essentially a wig she wears.  I can't really talk about her personality without spoiling the ending, she does spark up a relationship with Caleb which turns romantic and they talk about dates and such its not a rom com or a chick flick as there is still awkwardness in there.

Kyoko.

Essentially Nathans servant she does menial chores around the house and is implied to have a sexual relationship with Nathan although not really his girlfriend.  She doesn't speak and you can kinda guess what she is if you think about it, and what Nathan actually does seeing as he built Ava in a lab below ground.

Music.

This is what I really wanted to talk about as its the first time I've ever seen a film with a totally dark Ambient soundtrack.   The film score is by Geoff Barrow and Ben Salisbury and is totally good, there are some external tunes such as a bit of OMD or Oliver Cheatam when Nathan and Kyoko are dancing in a room, but forget that.  It reminds me of Aphex Twin SAW 2 in places and with some of the harder minimal techno pieces almost like Plastikman or Surgeon (Anthony Child) in places, in fact I had to wait to the credits rolled to see if they were on the sound track but wasn't. Like I said this is something special and is definitely on my favourite list of films.

Playbubblun.

We have a few bits and pieces that are strangely connected to each other in this round up so without further ado I'll begin.

Bubble Bobble Stuff.

If you've been browsing the front page we've added a link to Kimimi's Site that should hopefully work.  Forgot all about Kimimi's work on obscure games and this takes the cake for great new stuff.  Epoch are releasing some old coin ops in LCD game format and some of the first games are Fantasy Zone from Sega and Bubble Bobble from Taito.  Not quite sure how this is going to work in reality but the link above will let you see a brief clip with the iconic music and some gameplay which is cool.

Even better is a strange cheat mode that was uncovered in the X68000 version that will let you play a super tough version of the game but reskinned to look like odd shoot 'em up Syvalion.  Haven't actually got this to work in X68K highspeed yet (and there isn't really any updated X68000 emulators apart from MESS / MAME). Which is a shame as I always considered it to be Japans answer to the Amiga.

More info on the X68000 here. 

Playbore

I'm not kidding its fucking tedious.

If you haven't already heard, Playboy (the worlds dullest sex mag) is cutting out the nudes as, I quote, the world and his dog can see nudity and more online for free. The current owners want to turn it into a joyless version of Maxim but with "quality writing".

When growing up this was the one magazine that you didn't want to find under the hedge shredded up, as it was 95% article and very little tit and bum, and what you did see tended to be a lot blonde and very much silicone packed.  Can remember one especially grim issue with Sandra Bernhard from Hudson Hawk posing nude.

A shame as I always wanted to see a magazine like Loaded, do a Playboy and go the other way and show full nudity, especially if its 90's Loaded with Howard Hughes and the original prototype TV go home from Charlie Brooker.  They had some great writing then and some funny cartoons from Modern toss, Playboy never made me laugh.  Ever.

Put it this way if Playboy was a:
*game magazine they'd be the modern incarnation of Edge.
* rock 'n Roll they'd be Coldplay.
* sitcom they'd be Miranda.
* DJ they would be David Guetta
*football team they would be West brom.
*food it would be brown bread.

You get the idea.

As you've already had the glamour shots (see picture) I'll leave you with some quality articles to read.

The rise of anti Semitism in the left.
Van Nuys porn capital of the world.

Fully xxxpanded

Kicked out a particularly nasty virus this past couple of days.  Win.32 Banker according to Avast, did a boot time scan to root it out and a follow up scan to see if everything was caught.  Been having unexplained crashes for a while and blamed it on a windows update going rogue, everything would be fine until it wasn't and would freeze you out so the only thing to do was unplug and reboot, I'm pretty sure it was downloading random apk. files that got me this as well.  Which brings us onto our main story.

We grabbed a little Micro SD card from the floor of one of the blocks at work, its got a few nice things including some porno (hint we never find porn,) and a few tracks by some grime artists. The pron ain't all that, think more hard faced teens rather than amateur stuff and a lot of screen grabs including stuff from adultwork. 

The main odd thing I've come across is an APK. file for xxxpanded.tv one of the innumerable shake and grind channels from the upper reaches of Sky's channel guide.  You know the deal, they play some decent music and have the roughest slags available, shake their ass live, you never see any gash, and once in a while they'll be a half way decent girl on without tattoos or that heavily made up.  It isn't that erotic and quite frankly does nothing for me, so was quite surprised to see that there was a download of this in the download folder.

What it does.
From what I could tell from Bluestacks not much, at least it worked (Terra Battle and Puzzle and Dragons of which I've downloaded a few times now have never worked).  It gives you a list of phone lines to the girls online and a chance to look at their profile and hear an audio message or see a seawater quality clip of them try to act sexy through all the artifacts onscreen.  I wouldn't recommend opening up Audacity, selecting stereo mix from the drop down list and clicking record before you play the clip.  and I especially wouldn't recommend exporting the clip to use as free samples.  I suppose if you wanted to try it out on your phone you could actually dial the number and waste a bunch of money on some sex line but seeing as its going nowhere near my phone and as far as I can tell Bluestacks doesn't let you ring anyone its pretty much redundant.

Apart from that it did fuck all else, no live streams like on their site or TV schedule with the same 4 manky brasses.

 In fact if you are going to go anywhere near teh pron, then I would suggest this course of action.
Get antivirus up to date.
Same with any anti malware.
Add Noscript and an ad block to any browser you use 
They'll whinge like fuck when you visit but you can add just enough stuff so it'll play without you being bothered by ads and stuff.