Crooked Arrows

So, a new book up. The Sign of the Crooked Arrow, or the Hardys ride the range, to give it's improper title. 

Not a bad book either in its revised edit or original edition. The Hardy boys tackle the case of some robberies around Bayport, when their father is put out of commission by a rogue sniper. Their trail leads them to Crowhead ranch in New Mexico, run by their cousin, Ruth. The first (and last) time any of the extended Hardy family is mentioned, aside from Aunt Gertrude. 

Of course there is a mystery there, too. As she has been losing staff from her ranch. The boys fly out and with the help of some friendly cowboys, solve the mystery.

This is mainly remembered for me, by the travails of getting this sorted out. The original text wasn't half bad, it just needed proof reading and formatting and in one case, removing half a chapter, where it had been printed twice.

The remake though is another matter. It's not like the later condensed edits where most of the chapters remain the same but with occasional extension of sentences and the occasional extended paragraphs to bump it up to 25 chapters.  This is more like a considered rewrite where half the sentences remain the same but the rest is either all new material or rewritten from the original, but saying the same thing.

Also in this is Pye the Navajo. He is written much more considerately in the modern edit. The original has him speaking in a "heap big stereotype" style of speech. Quite frankly it got on my tits after a while and that sort of stuff never bothers me.

Anyway, here is the original and the remake for your reading pleasure.

ITV in the neck.

 A few things here found on either tapes or in books. First up some new VHS Mess for you.

We have brought home a fresh stock of old tapes to comb through. This includes some home recordings that ultimately peter out after about 10 minutes to go to ITV junk. Specifically the ITV Telethon 92, the last ever Telethon, with Michael Aspel and a we start with a feature film.

It's Hercules in New York, the first film of Arnie's career, a clunker of a film shot entirely in the NY area, and with him barely speaking English then, so we have him dubbed over by some bloke. I didn't see any ad breaks in this, so we fast forwarded through and currently am at the point where there is a special version of Hitman and Her with Springwatch's Michaela Strachan. I shall be looking forward how this pans out.

The second tape is the death of the Queen mum, two hours of deferential old shite before it ends and cuts to the Country House (Woburn Abbey) docu soap. This is also interesting and quite posh as well as it seems like a bunch of ravers had infiltrated his estate and set up a free party there. So far I'm about 2 minutes into this so will have to cap the whole thing and put it on YT. There is a sub plot about the lady of the house making her own coffin, which for some reason is hilarious.

Fantastic Facts.

The final thing here is a book which I've picked out, which is tied in to the whole theme as it used to be a TV show on ITV, I used to watch. Can remember a clip about Fainting Goats and that is all I remember. Anyway reading this at bedtime and there is a section on records. Being a collector of Dance, I decided to check through and see if any of them stack up.

The Radiophonic Workshop sound effects LP is real as I own it. (first sound effect record to reach the top 100.)

The Quantum Jump one (Lone Ranger, longest word used in a single) is also real. (Fun fact its used as a sample in Over 2 U What's it all mean) 

The smallest single ever made is also real (a tiny god save the King) and you can view it, here.

An Arab/ Israel band called Abu Hafla recorded an LP called Humpin' is bollocks. The band's full name is Abu Hafla Orchestra and their only LP according to Discogs is called Wanna Buy a Camel. What there is of it is quite a banger though.

Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys There ain't no instant replay in the football game of life Is by Mitch Greenhill. Though Kinky sounds an interesting guy. Bobby Bare Drop Kick me Jesus also exists, sadly.

The final one is the most tricky. but I think I have it. Worse it only exists as an obituary, but explains about the entry. Its IBM share price data set to music and was called Rhapsody In big blue. Touch Records did something similar but for weather temperature (its the Tobias Frere Jones track).

Round Up of Stuff

 Here is a few things that I can't be bothered with to expand out into fully fledged articles, so will have to make do with this mish mash of a post.

Jehovah's Letters.

We got a letter through the post from a Jehovah's Witness, basically a little kid spent time to me to write in pink ink about suffering and enclosed the usual Witness shit. I didn't read it all but seeing as all Witness stuff is treated like single Magpies or the number 13 in bad luck circles to me. It went  straight into the bin. 

But two things struck me as odd. 

One, these cunts are still going round, even in a pandemic, which given as they are all satanic end of the world apocalypticists, I thought they would be welcoming this with open arms.

Two, there is always a fuck load of money for bible shit. Glossy brochures that always end with John 3:16 and saying a prayer, even whole television channels. But I've never seen atheist literature or leaflets. Maybe were in the wrong scam. Or maybe we don't have a willing line up of people ready to put absolute shit loads of money into the pockets of corrupt evangelical shills.

 Hardy Boys TV show.

One of the things growing up in the 80's / 90's with piss poor TV  reception, is that you got Nickelodeon and a shed load of obscure tat from Central Europe courtesy of  The Children's Channel.

I can barely remember this version  just the main credits and that. Of course I watched it back then as I was a massive fan, but apart from that, nothing, its just gone.

Why bring this up, now, of all places. There is a new version out courtesy of Hulu. I don't care about streaming sites or paying for a subscription. I'll wait to see if there is a torrent or a DVD release of this, but for old fans like me, it doesn't bode well. 

First of all big, burly Biff Hooper is now gender swapped to be a girl. Joe Hardy is now a good few years younger than Frank. Worse of all, they seemed to have memory holed Iola Morton, an actual female character. I suppose it may get good, but I'm not holding out any hope of it.

All I'm asking for is my grim dark Fenton Hardy origin story to get the go ahead.

Crisscross Shadows

 Before I talk about this months book, I have some minor obscure news regarding The Children's Channel.

I've finally found the name of the music that went with the opening credits of Stories without words eastern European cartoon block.

It's one of those classical songs that you hear from time to time either in cartoons or used as filler, but I never knew the name of this legendary work. Now I can safely say the used Mendelssohn's Fruhlingslied as a signature tune. You can listen to it here.

Crisscross shadow.

We have a new book up for you, this time it's The Crisscross Shadow in both its UK and Original incarnations. 

It's one of those revised editions, where the revised edit is like a cut for TV experience. You lose the Hardys receiving an invisible Ink threat. Quite a bit from the hand egg and lacrosse games. And finally the Sleuth's mechanical problems are removed entirely in the revised edit.

The story itself concerns the boys receiving a visit from a strange salesman, selling Indian leather goods and winds up nicking a photo of Fenton Hardy. He gets off due to a crooked lawyer pal and the boys try to track him down via the leather goods. It leads to a remote Indian tribe called the Ramapans* and their legend of the crisscross shadow ,where the deeds to their land is hidden.

It's also the story where Chet's grandad gets his Indian name of Eat-a-whole-moose.

Not a bad tale overall and, like I say, its one of the later canon issues that have a few revisions to update them, but are not that dissimilar. You can read both remake and original stories, here.

*Note both Ramapan and Pashunk tribes mentioned here in the book are fictional.