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Sunday, 25 September 2016

A round up of sorts.

Haven't really had the time for one of these in ages, its basically when I'm out of ideas but have had a few things to pick up on for awhile now and they make excellent reading.

Vita stuff.

If you've been living under a rock you'll know that there's a brand new exploit out for the Vita called Henkaku, that allows you to run unsigned code and homebrew programs such as emulation and Doom.  Of course its been out a while and there is of course a firmware update that invalidates this but if you don't update then it should be OK its only some stupid on line functions anyway.  There are also a few things in the works such as rom dumpers and the like which is going to be interesting especially from a preservation perspective or emulation.  Also with a temporary way in it'll be fun to see what anyone comes up with. 

Private Magazine.

Been reading up about the history of Private, the long running Swedish Porno mag / film empire.  They are along with Color Climax some of the oldest porn merchants in Europe and yes I've been reading 70's porn again.

The article in question is actually a good read although there's no nudity possibly not one you'll want to read at work.  Largely it started by Berth Milton taking nude photos of models and then taking them to the justice ministry in the mid 60's and asking if they were permissible or not.  The answer they said is they didn't know, effectively publish and be damned, I won't spoil any more as its a cracking read.

Shit Film X Hess.

Finally found something to edit film for free.  Its a bastard hassle to get including liking on Facebook to get your download and a sign up to register but once you are in and registered its not so bad at all.

Its called Hitfilm 4 Express, and yes it renders out quite nicely with no watermarking or anything other shenanigans free stuff normally adds.  Its adequate for normal stuff and has a compositing strip so you can do ytp stuff and on screen graphics.  Its a bastard to like and register, but the program itself isn't disappointing, true you can't do time stretch stuff like in Vegas or pitch shifting to make YTPMV but you can use an audio editor for that.

Sunday, 18 September 2016


Spent a nice week down at Paignton in Devon.  We had good weather for a change as its normally changeable here in September, no record heatwave but it wasn't cold either and no storm on the friday as predicted which is a bonus. 

Its part of the south Devon coast and has some stunning sandy beaches along with rock pools when the tide goes out.  I'll warn you that the sea fair races in here, case in point we were gone about 20 minutes and what was a large pool with a sandbar became almost entirely under water and this was just yards from the sea front.  Also another good thing is that dogs were allowed on the beach in certain areas, so if you want to watch dogs chasing balls, digging in the sand and racing around then your needs are accommodated for.  

Hot digging dog
Also there were a load of gulls here, including the bully gull or Herring Gull as its more usually known.  We get them on the river at home along with Black Headed Gull and Greater or Lesser Black Backed Gulls, but here its just the Herring gull.  Mostly 1st season chicks, with a few adults getting their winter plumage which threw me for a bit as I've only ever seen them with pure white heads.

Gull second winter?
There's a great guide telling you what the various stages in a Herring Gull's life is here.  Apart from the gulls there were crows who seemed to be moulting as they looked ratty and dull. 

We did a few trips out down to a few places including Torquay, Paignton itself and Brixham.   First of all Brixham.  A lovely place where I stayed 30 years or so ago, can remember the all saints church and its impressive clock and that it played abide with me.  Turns out that it didn't but the vicar who wrote it lived there instead.  I ain't Christian no more, but its still one impressive building and the clock was as I remember it, black and imposing, and plays the half and quarter hours, sadly didn't hear it on the hour as I was back in the car then.

Another warning you'll get no phone signal in the town itself, just a heads up if you have a life and that.  Also they have a proper mental flogging the big issue which is worth the price of admission alone.


If its known for anything its the English Riviera and Fawlty Towers, we didn't find Basil's famous guest house although there was a Corbyn hotel presumably full of lefty scum.  Torquay itself is not bad but full of what can only be described as future Jeremy Kyle contestants, and tramps, its got a lot going for it including an impressive array of charity shops, but like I said tramp central.


Finally Paignton.  Rather reminds me of Salou in a way, both have rail lines that cut through the town and both have an impressive sea front.  Though Paignton reminds me more of Lowestoft here. We also have a few arcades though none have any classic coin ops and its all penny falls and slots.  I did however find 2 new pachislots to add to the list of places that have them displayed in the windows.

Neo Planett

Neo Pulsar
Both are by Yamasa and both are stuck in the window, apart from that they did the usual suspects, rainbow riches and Deal or No Deal so if being stared at by a bank of Noel Edmonds is your thing go for it.
 All in all though an excellent holiday. I'll leave you with the train.
Choo choo.

Sunday, 11 September 2016

Holiday rock

This is the first time I've live blogged on a vacation, as mostly I like an actual keyboard to type with.  I'm in Devon at the moment and on break so here are a few things to keep you ticking over, it's further thoughts from the free video blog I did.


We gave this another go and you can cut stuff with it, but it's a horrible faff to do involving zooming in and worse it never rendered anything out for me.  We downloaded Magic movie studio 13 (the new name for Vegas) and it's like putting on a old shoe that's how comfortable it feels.

Any Video Converter

Steer well clear of this, as the free version is full of bundles are aids. Unskippable Aids at that. If you don't want Chromium or so dodgy malware scanner steer clear. It also changes everything to Yahoo (it's always Yahoo, and I know no one who uses or likes it even) you can rid yourself of it with Malware bytes and Adwcleaner two of my main standby's.

Sunday, 4 September 2016

Sitcom Remakes

We've had a wave of remakes of beloved old sitcoms recently, Are you being served?, Porridge and a few origin stories for Keeping Up Appearances and Goodnight Sweetheart.  As well as a lost sitcom on BBC 4. 

Bear in mind that I love some of these shows, and the latter two were a part of me growing up even if I can't stand them now.  So I'm looking at these remakes with a certain eye.  This is going to be a review of sorts. although I missed the Goodnight Sweetheart reboot so wont cover it.

Are You Being Served?

They've shunted this to the late 80's and somehow drafted Mr Grainger back in even though he retired in the series a long time ago.  To be fair he reminds me of Mickey's Grandpa from the Mickeys Miniature grandpa comic strip in Viz though that would liven the show up if he was convinced he was 4 inches tall whenever anyone asked him to do anything, but I digress.  To be honest that's the least of their worries as its patchy as fuck, they have a black guy as a Mr Lucas replacement who works really well despite reigning in all borderline sexual harassment scenes with the Milflike Miss Brahms, but it took me almost the whole episode to work out what else was wrong with it.  Mr Humphries.

You may remember him as the slender, camp, purveyour of men's fashions, but he's much dumpier in the reboot, its jarring and worse reminds me of the excellent Suit You sketch from the Fast Show.
Boycey (Michael Challis) is spot on as Captain Peacock, and Sherrie Hewson is boss as Mrs Slocombe, notably excellent is Mr Rumbold complete with dolly bird secretary.  Like I say it doesn't come off and the humour is a bit too crude, pussy jokes aside.  For extra Viz references this feels like a Finbarr Saunders strip made flesh, all innuendo and no climax.  For bonus points they really do have a young Mr Grace in this, a Gordon Gecko grandson of the original but as I kept thinking it was Stephen Mulhern throughout  I can ignore him and say its good but not the original.


Even though I love Ronnie Barker, I've never really watched the originals, I know Godber was his cellmate and Mchaie was the Scots jailer who caused him mischief, but that's that.  I largely got my Ronnie Barker fix through Open All Hours, or the much forgotten Clarence.   This updates the original with Fletch's grandson in jail for hacking, it reigns in the jock bashing of the original even though the screw is still Scottish (a Mr Meekie).  Weirdly I kept thinking they had teleported Harry Enfield from the 80's turns out its Kevin Bishop as Fletch instead.  The plot is some nonsense about changing the parole records of an old lag due out soon, with some heath robinson junk involving a pringles can and a smart phone.  Its not bad and as its an all new cast could easily be made to a full series.

Young Hyacinth.

Sounds like I missed a cracker with the Goodnight Sweetheart as I slept through an extended Gardener's World instead.  Sadly I was up and at 'em for this unfortunately.  Its cancer, fucking cancer, just her irritating voice was enough to keep me awake, the upper class twats she worked for and her daft bint sisters kept me shivering.  Clock watching, her dad's a pisshead on a bike and they live in a lock keepers cottage.  Fuck.  Hey Rose is still a tart, is that the joke, the whole joke, jesus fuck no. 

I kept wanting it to end, to put me out of my misery,  I got out 5 minutes before the end, but not before losing my will to live and sanity.

Alf Garnett Reboot.

This isn't part of Sitcom season as its a recreation of a wiped show from the archive using the original script, next Thursday they'll be doing a Hancocks Half Hour, which promises to be good. 

Johnny Speight was another genius in my book, you looked at Alf not as a role model but as a joke.  He had no power, not at home, not at anytime, he was a parody of the kind of bigots on the terrace and in the streets.You weren't there to agree with his views they were a piss take pure and simple.

This is a remake with Simon Day as Alf Garnett who is mainly spot on, and the script revolves him not having his dinner due to Else his wife burning it due to her going off to the Pictures with Rita and the Scouse Git.  Who ever it was playing Else got her spot on, close your eyes and its her, dead on.  Mike's chinese in this but that hardly matters as weirdly it works too.  The best thing about this is that though it's dated, it works.  They've got a script with bugger all racism in it which is a miracle, and only mildly sexist to boot, largely the phone box scene (told you its dated) where Alf has to phone up Rita in the chippy to order, and there is some young bird in there on the phone to her fella.

Won't spoil it for you but, this is the best thing of the current remakes, its filmed in front of a studio audience and best of all no canned laughter.