Final Fantasy for Potterheads.

What does that title even mean. and if you know what game its actually the byline to then give yourself ten points, because I don't think anyone would get it from that.

I've never read Harry Potter he always came over as an insufferable little prick in the films, I have played Final Fantasy. So if you immediately think of a JRPG stuffed full of insufferable 15 year old Bishonen twunts and anime waifus, you'd fail as this is actually describing Fire Emblem.Be glad that JK Rowling isn't doing this, as there'd be an after market patch that made every character trans, because that's how they were meant to be.

For those wondering about what Fire Emblem is, its a Wargame with permadeath that is well regarded in Japan but not so in the west despite the games themselves being great. That tag line is from the print edition of the Metro Newspaper. The online version is here and is still tainted with the Potter curse.

If we were going to sell the series, I'd say it was basically an anime Game of Thrones but a touch less grim. Your characters still die though, due to bad planning, over confidence and a gamble on outcomes that you can misjudge. Badly.

There's a rock paper scissors style to the combat, don't put any flying horses up against archers even though they have great range, likewise any one with close range weapons can decimate archers and mages. Later instalments brought romance options to your doomed troops, and of course the garbage people have been whinging for gay relationship options, just because well why not.

The series (by Advanced Wars developer Intelligent systems) has been running since NES days in Japan, and there's patches for the NES and SNES instalments over at RHDN, for the curious. It's a bit of a late system game too, 776 Thracia came out in 1999 well into the Playstation era.

For me, the GBA game Secret Stones with Lady Lyndis and Elwood was my introduction to the series, and can say that it doesn't disappoint, at all. There are of course more recent games to pick, and I'd say don't bother with Shadow Dragon for DS, and choose any of the 3DS incarnations to get you money's worth.

Edit now with screenshot.

Finally as I was up town for reasons last Friday, I will give a shout out to Dimes Juices as a blatant plug, especially their apple and sour cherry flavour. Really good Fruit Juices from turk e yay (Turkey)
and worth the 79p spent on it. Also the folks in the shop, I got it from, had a huge black and white cat (a shop Byron if you will.) sitting out so if I'm back that way, I'll be sure to go back.

Casio Cortez

Work has thrown up a few nice things of late. A pair of synths that are a cut above the normal you would expect to find.  My baseline is usually some cheapo Casio SA1 variant, or some no brand little kid synth complete with duck quacks and nursery rhyme demo tunes.

What I found is a pair of full size Casio and Yamaha GS Wavetable synths from sometime in mid 2000's. Replete with midi ports and a few learning modes they're really good beginner synths for those that have the room.

Oh, if that sounds familiar, Microsoft GS Wavetable is bundled with every version of Windows as the default on-board sounds for MIDI.

Both work, although the lowest black key C# doesn't work in the Yamaha. It's not a deal-breaker as it has XG lite over the Casio's GS Wavetable only selection.  It also uses standard AA batteries whereas the Casio has the D Cells which I had to cannibalize from my original Yamaha PSR 200.

Below, I'll give you a way to connect the Casio via MIDI so you can use it in your DAW, it's not ideal mind, as when it goes into stand by mode it will reset and you'll need to follow these steps again.

Warning 1:

The Yamaha at present is untested. Don't ask how to connect.

Warning 2:

My DAW is pretty obscure, and I never got it  to work with LMMS, my other Music production suite.
With this in mind let's begin.

You'll need to connect your MIDI cables right, as you will get no output at all if you get it wrong.

Input goes to output and output goes to input.

You can use MIDI OX to test your inputs on windows. Mac Users can use Snoize (not that I have a Mac mind.)

On your Casio you need to press the transpose / MIDI button and scroll through to find these parameters. Use the + and - keys to turn them off.

GM Mode =  On
Local Mode = Off This turns off the sound and lets you use your DAW's soft synths as the main keyboard Sounds.

You can skip this bit as it relates to Psycle Tracker.  But in the main menu go to settings > Configuration then MIDI and select USB synth from the drop down box. Load up a synth and connect it and it should play. You'll see volume outputs and hear sound if it works.

For other DAWS you'll probably need to find where your MIDI settings are for each one.  As I final note I have a USB to MIDI cable that I use to connect. Its quite useful, and can be gotten from EBAY for around £3 or $4 for the yanks out there.

Coro Coro Comic

For those that know, Coro Coro Comic is a phone book sized monthly manga, that is known for putting out the Pokemon manga amongst others. I have two issues, September 1996 and an issue from 20 years or so later. I got the 90's issue from the long defunct Lewisham bootsale for the sum of 75p, and while it's tatty round the edges now, it came with a few Pokemon pencil case games, and other bits and pieces.

Recently been scanning in bits and pieces from this brick sized comic and trying to see if there's a scan of the obscure Mole Mania manga, which features in it. 

Looking through there are ads for Popolocrois, Bubblicious gum, and lots of Hudson Soft games, Bomberman and it's B-Daman spin off, which I remember there being an anime for a long time back, the manga is featured in there of course, along with Bomberman Yonkoma.

 My favourite is of course Class King Yamazaki and blue sky ozora. A gag manga and roughneck baseball manga respectively. There is of course a few Nintendo manga in there. Pokemon, as mentioned, but there is Kirby Manga and expand dong (Donkey Kong) also feature, too. 

Finally to cap it off there is some Doraemon stuff, which is probably translated into Spanish as they love the little guy. It revolves around cavemen and Colonel Sanders, along with the regular crew of Nobita and Doraemon.

Names on a postcard please.

I'll leave you with some scans I've already done. The J league stuff is interesting. I think the ginger guy is Alexei Lalas. Whereas the guy with the fish is this guy Looks like a bad pun on Maguro / Magrao.  Finally I'll add the odd Shiren the Wanderer maze which I'm sure I've added before but can definitely be added again.

Can you make it to the exit.

Wouldn't Even Explain you.

Forgive me for being late to this particular party. but here is my take on a few things basically Sargon related. In particular its the supposed joke / comeback to MP Jess Phillips that I need to address and matters arising from such.

Cards on the table first. I have been a subscriber to Sargon's Channel since gamergate, the popular uprising against corrupt game journalists, along with Thunderf00t and Mr Metokur/ Internet Aristocrat.  Possibly two of his biggest detractors.  My politics are centre right. Think the 2011 election in the UK lib dem power sharing but with acutal likeable people in charge, that's basically my politics, in a nutshell.

The joke?

I kinda like the actual joke, even if it's not funny in the first place.  The context is that Sargon hates Jess Phillips because of her laughing at Male Suicide numbers in a parliamentary debate. The wouldn't even rape you remark is part of a twitter spat between the two, which this culminated in him being kicked off Twitter for good (and previously banned for posting interracial gay pr0n on an exchange with the alt right.)

Its a pretty savage comeback and it ranks as one of the better insults I've heard, if not particularly funny.  My take on it, is this. I read this as an act beneath him to do. As a woman he wouldn't rape her because she wasn't worth it. She's so utterly below him as a person, that he wouldn't carry it out. And apparently I'm wrong. Sorta.

Its more like, I wouldn't rape you because its abhorrent, (and rape is, if you're wondering.) and that although if the opportunity arose, then he still wouldn't.  Maybe it's both, maybe it's neither I just wanted to do my take on this joke. 

Fallout.

Of course when the whole UKIP MEP candidacy arose, the press had a field day, dragging up these tweets and bringing it into the open and totally misrepresenting his word, by calling them rape threats. They're not, by the way. It's a statement of  disintent rather than intent. And proves my point that modern news publishing is a joke. And it went full circle with him adding that he would consider it, but there wasn't enough beer in world for him to contemplate it.

The final evolution of the whole thing is a spot on Have I Got News For you a previously funny show, that I gave up watching a few years back. With the never funny Jo Brand as guest host, and Jess Phillips as a contestant, calling him a neckbeard and laughing at him getting milkshaked by left wing incels at a  UJKIP rally. 

Summary

I still don't find it funny, most internet drama isn't, and while I rate it as a top drawer insult and comeback, it's not really humorous as such. Those describing it as a joke or as comedy then please don't, Sargon: A. isn't a comedian and B, its an insult, an aside, a come back and should be treated as such.